70/ 30

Friendships are like relationships. They take work, communication, love…but lately they just seem hard. Have you ever felt like you give more than you get? That people take and take and take from you without giving anything back but your okay with that because that’s just the kind of person you are? Well that is me. I have some friends that I feel like they would never make an extra effort for me and I am the kind of person that would still try and bend over backwards if they need me. I am so sick of feeling this way. I just want some friends who will be there for me WHENEVER I need them and me in return. Is it too much to ask for friendships to be an equal 50/50?

 

Xoxo

Advertisements

On The Verge.

Today is the day. I knew it was coming. I was dreading it. Although still hopeful that it wouldn’t. Getting the text was like ice rushing through my veins. “She’s having a really hard time right now..” I knew what was happening before I even finished reading. Depression. Again. It’s something that has been happening with my mom since I was 16. We have been on a good streak. She has been happy. Funny. Silly. Now?

I called her between classes. Crying. She believes she is a failure. I tell her she’s not. She says sorry for every little thing, even crying. I tell her she doesn’t have to. It doesn’t help/.

Hands shaking as I write this and I feel the same way I do every. single. time. this happens. I’m 21 years old and I’m scared to “lose” my mom. That is exactly how it feels.

Sounds a little selfish of me considering everything she is going through right now. I just know I will be the only one to see it all and the only one to pick up the pieces. Everyone else like to give her a big enough radius. As if they will catch it or something if they get to close. I hate that they aren’t there for her.

 

Xoxo

Let’s Get Intimate.

Hey guys! So it’s almost been a month since I have posted anything and I feel terrible. I’ve been really busy and uninspired. Anyway, I am sad to say I am almost done with this series because I am on my second to last post of the things I wrote in the past. This gives me an unique opportunity to not only continue to express my feelings in this series, but the things I will be posting will be about how I’m feeling currently. All of the words in this series I have posted so far had been in the past, the latest being 3 years ago. So here is the second to last post of the past.

“Rejected…just rejected.”

Short and sweet.

Xoxo

Let’s Get Intimate.

Hey guys! Sorry I haven’t posted in awhile. I’ve been super busy with school and its finals week so forgive me. Really quick, here is my next one>

“I got mad a my friend the other day. Over something so stupid. I was so mad that I balled up my fists and didn’t talk for a little while. I didn’t know if I wanted to slap her or cry or both.”

Xoxo